3 weeks old!

i can't beleive that hayden is 3 weeks old already...
While pregnant, 3 weeks felt like an eternity, but now that he's finally here in my arms, and he's in my arms constantly, time is just flying by...
He has changed so much since the day we brought him home. He's filled out more, he's got a cute double chin and his cheeks are almost chipmunky. I no longer fear that i'm going to break or rip off a limb when I pick him up. He no longer resembles a frog constantly because he straightens his legs out more now and when he's looking at me or an object it actually seems like he can see it instead of the glazed over focus he had in the beginning.
I love that he cluster feeds during the day, and while doing so, i read to him. I was finally able to make it through both "Guess How Much I Love You" and "On the Day you were born" today without crying which i couldn't do before.

I love co-sleeping and I love that he allows me to sleep for 3 or so hours a night before waking up to eat and then eating for a good 45 minutes. I love that he stays awake for another 15-20 minutes to hang out and "talk" to me.....and then allowing me another 3 hours before i get up with him for the rest of the day. I dont mind that i'm constantly changing diapers. It seems as though as soon as i change him, he's dirtying up the next one, but it's good b/c it means he's eating and getting the nutrients he needs.

best of all, he is starting to resemble a little person with an amazing personality, he makes other noises besides crying when hes 'talking' to me and, I know it's still involuntary, but he smiles at me even when he doesn't have gas! He's awake a lot more than he was even a week ago and i really cherish these awake moments that we have together. I love being able to look into his beautiful blue eyes. But i enjoy his asleep time too...b/c i get to watch him sleep...his facial expressions, his snorts. i wonder what he dreams about and if he is enjoying being outside of me, i wonder if he feels as safe out here as he did when he was inside. Part of me is excited to see him changing and growing...i can't wait to see what the future holds for us but part of me is sad because it's happening so fast and I know I'm going to miss this.
he is my little lovey. Referring to myself as 'mama', being HIS mama is the best feeling in the world, yet there are no words to really describe how it feels.